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The Family Room by Michelle Martin

August 17, 2008

Lazy days of summer

I remember when Caroline was a baby who awakened at the crack of dawn — or earlier — every day. I’d stumble into her room, gather her up, settle in on the couch and doze off while I fed her. In the background, PBS kids shows would play. This was at the height of the Teletubbies; I defy any adult not to at least zone out, if not fall dead asleep, when the Teletubbies are on.

Fast forward 10 years, and Caroline has become (gasp!) a late riser. There have been days I have had to wake her up just so I could get to work on time. And while she is 10, and approaching the teen years, when body clocks seem pre-set to prefer late nights and late mornings, it’s rubbed off on Frank, who is only 7. Yesterday, he proudly announced that he slept until 10 a.m.

Of course, that’s after staying up until past 10 the night before. I know 10 p.m. is no reasonable bedtime for a 7-year-old. That’s why bed time is 9 p.m. in the summer.

But I have a hard time enforcing it too strictly. I can usually get both kids in bed around 9 p.m. The problem is that they don’t go to sleep.

I’ll check on them at 9:30; Caroline is reading and Frank is playing an electronic Yahtzee game. I tell Caroline her lights must be out by 10 and tell Frank to go to sleep when his game is over.

At 10, she’s turned out her light, but has set her nightlight on top of her notebook to draw. Frank has found a flashlight and is reading. I tell them both to go to sleep.

At 10:30, Frank comes into the kitchen to ask for new batteries for his flashlight. I tell him he can have them in the morning, take the flashlight and tell him to go to sleep.

And so the evening goes.

Of course, now that their day camps are over and their days are a hodgepodge of time with their grandparents, aunts, uncles and friends (and the occasional parent taking a vacation day), there’s not a lot of reason for them to be up early in the morning. When they do get up, they tend to patter around the house in their PJs for an hour or so. Maybe longer if they stay with their grandparents after I go to work.

I’m sympathetic. I remember my mother having to drag me out of bed to make it to 10 a.m. swimming lessons in the summer — and the pool was right across the street from my house. I remember sleeping until 11 a.m. on the weekend at least once. It must have been a Saturday; my dad always made us go to 7:30 a.m. Mass on Sunday.

As the summer draws to a close, I think I’ll have to start waking them earlier, little by little. School starts at 8 a.m. Aug. 27, and 8 o’clock comes early when you’re not used to rolling out of bed until 9.

The season is already showing signs of changing. It’s getting dark soon after 8, which should make it easier to go to sleep, and there have been early mornings when the air actually felt a little bit chilly.

How do I know that, when the kids have been sleeping so late? I haven’t been able to sleep in with them.

Somehow, no one told the dog that it was OK to stay in bed later in the summer.

Martin is assistant editor of the Catholic New World. Contact her at [email protected].