AIDS: Bringing something good out of bad

In some ways, Jamie K. Morales is a poster child—literally—for the devastating effects of HIV/AIDS.

Now a 21-year-old pre-veterinary student at Kansas State University, Morales lost both her parents and her godfather to the disease. She has been speaking about AIDS prevention since she was 8 years old, after the death of her mother, and was featured in photos originally taken for a Catholic Health Association project. Those photos are now part of a traveling exhibit created by Catholic Relief Services about AIDS orphans around the world. The exhibit was on display at the Daley Center in December. Morales took time from her studies to participate in an e-mail interview with Catholic New World staff writer Michelle Martin.

The Catholic New World: How old were you when the pictures in the CRS display were taken? How had AIDS affected your life at that point?  

Jamie K. Morales: At the point the pictures were taken, I was 8 years old and  I was going through a very rough time. Right after my mom died, when I was 7, I moved in with my aunt and uncle on my dad’s side. However, they made it very clear that they did not want me. Then I moved to Kansas to live with Sandy (Hysom, her guardian) when I was 8. My life got turned around, everything was new, and I no longer had a mom. Six months later my dad moved to Kansas to be closer to me. However, I was not able to live with him because he was too sick to take care of me, but I visited him often. TCNW: What was you relationship with your dad like before your mom died? JKM:  I was always a daddy’s girl. We were very close and our father-daughter relationship strengthened even more after my mom died. I will forever and always be a daddy’s girl even though he has passed.

TCNW: How did your experience with AIDS affect you as you grew up? JKM: I had to grow up very fast. I didn’t have much of a childhood at all. I spent most of my time helping to take care of my mom when she was alive as well as raise myself. When my dad moved to Kansas I started helping to take care of him as well. There were times he got very sick. He took 63 pills a day and when he was not feeling well I was the only person who could get him to take his pills. So much of my childhood was spent raising myself and taking care of my parents.

TCNW: When you say you were taking care of your mom and then your dad, what does that mean? Cooking and cleaning, daily tasks, emotionally supporting them? JKM: I did help out with daily tasks. I got my own breakfast in the morning which only consisted of dry cereal and a Pepsi because that is all that I could get a hold of. I took care of my mom when her fiancé (not Morales’ father) would beat her and try to stand up for her but then I would get beat too. With my dad it was usually medical things I would help out with. Because I was older, I helped out around the house and with cooking. I mostly helped out with his medications, though. I reminded him to take them on time, got his pills ready, and helped out when he cut himself or injured himself. I helped out a lot when he was in a wheelchair with getting around and doing little everyday tasks. Most of that was within the last couple of years before he died though, when we were in Kansas.

TCNW: Did it make you different from other kids you knew? In what ways? JKM: When I was younger I never thought of myself as different from other kids. Even when I moved to Kansas and moved it with Sandy I never really saw myself as different. Other kids had parents and I had a guardian. It was sometimes hard to explain but it seemed normal to me.

TCNW: Why did you decide to let your image and story be used? JKM: I started telling my story simply because I did not want anyone to have to learn about the disease the way I did.

TCNW: How has that decision changed you and changed your life?  JKM:  When I started telling my story I had no idea what would come of it. Sandy did not even want me to start speaking because she thought I would get some negative attention from it, but I convinced her I would be fine. I started out with small groups and my name quickly got spread. Soon larger groups wanted to me to come speak and entire schools wanted me to do assemblies. I started winning awards and getting to travel and being featured in magazines. Some of the fame and the cameras that came with all of this got to be difficult. It seemed that wherever I went someone knew me or someone was watching. I let it continue because the whole idea was to spread my message to as many people as possible and I used the cameras and the media to do that. I figured the more people that saw me the more programs I might get to do and the more people would hear my story. I guess you could say it has been a success. I have personally spoken to over 21,000 people. Three thousand of those were kids in South Africa. I am very proud of what I have accomplished in these past 21 years. So many people hear my story and think “how sad.”

But I tell my story and think, “I just saved someone’s life.” Out of something bad always comes something good. I have changed my life into that good.

TCNW: What message do you want people to take away from the exhibit? JKM: Basically I want people to know that this does not have to happen to you. No one has to get this disease. It is based on peoples’ choices whether or not they become infected. When people do become infected it does not just hurt them ... it hurts and affects everyone’s lives around them. No one should have to go through what I have gone through to learn about this disease. It can all be summed up into five words:  “choose not to get AIDS.”

INTERVIEW Archive