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The Family Room by Michelle Martin

November 9, 2008

All hallows eve

Halloween this year fell on an unseasonably warm day, and in our neighborhood, there were packs of trick-or-treaters out from late afternoon until way past dark.

But the holiday itself didn’t have a dark or spooky feel, at least not where I live.

Pumpkins were carved into goofy or friendly faces as often as into spooky growls, and the oversized plastic spiders on yarn webs didn’t even scare the littlest ones.

Most of the smaller kids we saw were dressed in fun costumes: princesses and pirates, superheroes, even a few bumblebees and pumpkins among the babies.

Bigger kids often opted for scarier costumes, with white ghoulish makeup and darker clothes, but it’s hard to be frightening when you say thank-you for free candy.

I proudly wore cat ears as I walked with Caroline (a cat burglar, the better to carry a big sack for the loot) and Frank (a Blackhawks player, Jonathan Toews according to his jersey).

We saw several other parents dressed up, too, as they escorted their children.

Legend says Celtic people started dressing up on Halloween to hide themselves from the spirits that would come looking for them; I’ve always thought at least as many people dressed up like the spirits to frighten their friends.

Later, when the church moved its observation of the feasts of All Saints and All Souls to the waning of the year, it seems to have acknowledged that people’s minds turn to the dead during this season – and said, inasmuch as we believe in the communion of saints, that’s a good thing, as long as we remember that while the dead are with us, they aren’t waiting to jump out from behind trees and say boo.

Now, Halloween seems to be a holiday when children (and adults) can try on other identities — good and bad — for a while. Caroline, a fundamentally honest kid, can pretend she’s the kind who would rob you if she could; Frank can indulge his fantasy of being a professional hockey player.

Over the years, Caroline has been a princess (more than once) and a fairy, a pioneer girl from a children’s book, the hero of a Disney TV show and a doctor (at age two, two months after having surgery.)

Frank has been Tigger, Thomas, a firefighter, and a cat (more than once).

Both seem to have left princesses and superheroes behind. I’m not sure how many years of trick-or-treating Caroline has left, but I hope it’s at least a few. Trying on other personalities can help all of us figure not only who we are, but who we want to be.

Martin is assistant editor of the Catholic New World. Contact her at [email protected].